Photo: Courtesy of Zillow
808-810 Taylor Ave.
If you require housing for less than $200,000, well, you’re in luck! Pittsburgh still has plenty of houses at that price point, and below. The only catch? They might look a little weird.
Sometimes, that’s an agglomeration of choices made over many decades, where a house started out close to a baseline of normal, and gradually ended with a weird result: questionable cladding, baffling awnings, poorly conceived porches, and so on.
Sometimes, weirdness is a physics problem — how do you cram a house onto a tiny perch between a ravine and a river, or on land that nobody else wanted? Occasionally, weirdness is a function of age; a lot of houses were built for people who were pretty different than us, and their reasoning is lost in the mists of time.
And sometimes, it’s just straight-up J.D. Vance-style weirdness, a kind of belligerent eccentricity that doesn’t accomplish much besides making everyone uncomfortable.
The good news is that “weird” has no set definition. There’s a lot of overlap between weird and “fun,” and even “charming” (at least in my book). Plus, if you look at a lot of houses, novelty is kind of its own reward … but you do have to live there, so it’s got to appeal to you on some level.
For sale: 808-810 Taylor Ave., Bellevue. $175,000
Ground control to Major Tom. This house looks like some kind of alien artifact trying to disguise itself as a house, getting most of the details right, but something still seems a little off. Is it the spindly wooden beams that seem to mysteriously hold up the entire second floor? Is it the odd little attic that seems to have scurried to one side of the house? Is it the aggressively white, bland interior (OK everybody does this)? We thought aliens wanted to rule us with an iron fist, but what if they’re just here to pick our brains about the latest trends in carpet on this side of the galaxy
Photo: Courtesy of Zillow
3439 Bates St.
For rent: 3439 Bates St., Oakland. $650/month.
I like it when a duplex clearly has split personalities. Like, symmetry shouldn’t be a hard concept to master; it’s a reason why we tend to find some things attractive. And yet, it’s more fun when one side inexplicably has a washed-out, worn finish on its brick façade, and sees the world through thick, unsentimental ‘60s glass block windows. Both sides have their appeal, but $650 a month in Oakland is the final arbiter.
Photo: Courtesy of Zillow
333 Jucunda St.
For sale: 333 Jucunda St., Beltzhoover. $224,000.
This is a really nice, sturdy brick four-square from 1900 that looks like it collided with a weatherbeaten Maine lighthouse somewhere on a hillside in Beltzhoover. Happens all the time. That cupola protruding from the roof is painted red and left to peel a bit, which makes it extra odd. But otherwise, it’s a pretty nice house, with six bedrooms (!), room for a garden, and even a detached garage out back.
Photo: Courtesy of Zillow
215 Kingsboro St.
For rent: 215 Kingsboro St., Allentown. $1,250/month.
Is this fireplace transmitting a message from the Beyond in Morse code or something? Is it about to open a wormhole into Christmas Day, Pittsburgh, 1949? (I’d go find my grandpa at the Heinz plant.) The ad points out the proximity to Mt. Washington as a selling point, but Allentown certainly has enough going on these days to generate some interest, too. If you’re looking to start a shop or restaurant in a walkable neighborhood, the list of affordable options in Pittsburgh isn’t large nowadays, but it includes a few districts in the Hilltop like Allentown.
Photo: Courtesy of Zillow
1219 Ribb Way
For sale: 1219 Ribb Way, Brighton Heights. $185,000.
Pittsburgh’s supply of a few things – potholes, linebackers, etc. – never really runs out, and maybe weird little houses should be added to that list. What is even going on here? We all learn how to draw a house when we’re in Kindergarten. But there’s always one kid who’s like “Nah, I’m gonna put four windows smooshed off to one side, leave a giant blank wall in front and no front door!” There’s a wooded ravine out back with a big deck overlooking it. Who needs curb appeal when you can just face the forest?
Photo: Courtesy of Zillow
93-94 Irvine St.
For rent: 93-94 Irvine St., Unit 1. Greenfield. $1,300/month.
I have a relative who always secretly wanted to have a family compound — not just one house, but a bunch all together, like the Kennedys. (That was a 1960s reference; I only sort of get it). Well, if you wanted to start your family compound in the verdant hills of Hazelwood, here’s a place for that. The juxtaposition of cold, stark minimalism inside and grandma’s house on the outside is kind of fun actually.